By Mom Gets A Life Expert Lin Eleoff
Is that any way to treat someone we’re supposed to love?
We do not really give ourselves much credit for being able to handle our feelings. After all, they’re feelings, nothing more than feelings. (Remember that song?) Yes, I get it, nobody likes to feel sad or lonely or angry, but denying the feeling just leads to other behaviors you don’t like either, to wit: overeating, overdrinking, overspending, overanything.
I work with women who use food to tend to their feelings or make them “go away.” They tell me food makes them feel better. One client recently came to the realization that she uses food and eating as a way to give her mind a rest from all the worrying she does. Food gives her a break from anxiety. But as you can imagine, once she comes down from the “quick fix” that food gives her, she actually feels worse, because now she has “guilt” layered on top of the anxiety.
And so it goes.
Our minds are meant to work for our bodies. Every thought we think and every belief we have ought to serve us. What I mean is: if you think good-feeling thoughts, then your body will be happy — it will feel good. The trouble is, we often believe we have no choice when it comes to our thoughts, and that belief itself is going to cause you to feel helpless and powerless.
Our power lies in the thoughts we choose and the beliefs that drive those thoughts. Did you know that your beliefs are just thoughts you’ve been practicing over and over for years? Those beliefs affect how you feel on a daily basis, as well as your attitude, and your overall personality.
If you’re struggling with your weight, and have been for years, you are most likely stuck in a “diet mentality” which keeps you spinning in an endless loop of Cry-Eat-Repeat.
Ready to stop? Well, ironically, stopping starts with looking at your mind… just noticing how you think, and how your thinking makes you feel, is a BIG first step.
Next, ask yourself where a thought came from, and how that thought affects the way you feel. If it feels good, keep it; if it doesn’t don’t, notice what happens next: what is it you are tempted to do to make the negative feeling go away? Often we reach for food for that very reason.
We feel badly. We cry. We eat to feel better. We repeat the cycle all over again. Instead, try sitting with the feeling. If you are not hungry, what happens if you don’t eat? What is it you’re trying not to feel?
You may be surprised by what you find out: our feelings have a lot to teach us.