If you’d asked me a couple of weeks ago,
“Patty, do you carry grudges?”
I would have said, “Not really.”
Sure, maybe there was some old stuff lingering in the shadows of my mind, but I didn’t identify as a grudge-holder.
But here’s the truth:
I had just rebranded my grudges as “discernment.”
Whenever I felt an inner growl toward someone, I told myself I was just being wise—recognizing their true character.
Last week, that illusion came crashing down.
I spent three full days at my daughter’s high school decorating for their Grad Night celebration (don’t ask—that’s an email for another time). As I moved through the hallways, I clocked three women I couldn’t stand to be in the same room with.
All of them had a history—pushing personal agendas, threatening teachers, manipulating systems so their kids could get special treatment or avoid consequences. What they did felt wrong. My resentment felt justified.
So no, these weren’t grudges… this was righteous anger. (Right?)
Until I saw one of them—alone in a corner, struggling to do a task that clearly required two people. No one was helping her. And I wasn’t surprised. People tend to steer clear if they’re not obligated to work with her.
And I felt… good.
Like, sooooo good.
My inner little demon was thrilled. Snarling. Dancing around.
And that’s when it hit me:
This wasn’t discernment.
It was a grudge.
And worse—I was feeding off of it.
I suddenly saw it clearly.
There were three people I was holding this weight against. And I didn’t want to anymore.
I stepped away into a quiet hallway, put down the giant roll of tape I was hauling, and whispered a prayer:
“Please take this from me.
Take this ugliness.
I don’t want to carry it anymore.”
Something subtle shifted. And within the hour, I realized the burden was gone. I felt… lighter. Freer. A little more alive.
The next morning, I got on the scale.
Down two pounds.
That was the weight of the grudges I’d been carrying—literally.
Now, I still don’t prefer these women. I’m not inviting them over for tea, and I certainly don’t trust them. But I also don’t wish them harm. The wall I had built is gone. There’s just space now.
This is one of the gifts of the times we’re in:
Yes, things are intense.
Yes, old wounds are in our face.
But the support available to help us release that old weight?
It’s potent.
I’m not suggesting you give up your grudges.
Or even admit you have any.
But if things have felt heavy lately…
Maybe it’s not just emotional.
Maybe you’re dragging around something that’s ready to go.
And if you’re thinking,
“Nah, Patty. I like my grudges. They fuel me. I thrive on righteous rage.”
I see you. You do you.
But if that weight ever starts to feel like too much to carry, here’s what I want you to know:
Your Spirit Team can help.
Find a quiet corner—or a locked bathroom stall if that’s all you’ve got—and just say:
“Take this from me. I don’t want to carry it anymore.”
There’s just one caveat:
You need to be fully ready to let it go.
You don’t need to know how to release it.
You just need to mean it—heart and soul.
That’s when the real magic begins.
Love,
Patty
P.S. If this kind of release is calling to you, there are still two open spots for the Dublin retreat. It’s a sacred space to let go of the weight you’ve been carrying—internal or otherwise. You can register here.
