I love gratitude like every other self-help book thumping coach in the land. Really, if you want to love your life you need to incorporate gratitude. But there is this magical place where much healing can happen that most women bypass.
It is the “This-Sucks, Feeling-Sad and Sorry-for-myself” space we avoid like the plague – especially around the holidays.
I hear from my clients on a weekly basis every variation on “I should be grateful.” As in:
“My children are healthy so I know I should be grateful.”
“People have it so much worse than we do. I should be grateful.”
“I have nothing to complain about. My bills are paid. I should be grateful.”
This is my first Thanksgiving without my mom. I’m not sure I will be grateful for everything else I have. I may just hang out thinking about who is not there. My mom.
And you know what? That is ok!
It’s okay if you don’t feel like being grateful this year. Sometimes really sucky things happen to good people and you may just be one of those good people.
Giving yourself a little room to feel bad about what you don’t have can sometimes open up the greatest awareness of what you do have. Then once you are done sulking, dry those tears and make a list of what you might be ready to smile about next year.
You don’t have to appreciate it just yet. Just know it will be there for you when you are ready!