A few days after my dad died I messaged my coach to let him know my dad had passed and I wouldn’t be participating in our mastermind for at least a few weeks. He responded that of course he understood, that he and all my mastermind peeps would be there for me and to just let him know what I needed.
It wasn’t until he said that, that I breathed a big exhale and realized I was expecting an entirely different kind of response.
After all, I had been in the middle of a launch, something we had worked on for months and literally hours away from opening up “my cart” to sell. It wouldn’t be outrageous, in the world of business coaching, for him to encourage me to just “push through” and finish.
Seven years earlier when my mom died that was pretty much what my coach at the time inferred. She didn’t say it outright. Right after my mom died she was sympathetic but within a couple of weeks she said: “Why don’t you let me know when you want to get back to working on your success.”
She wasn’t trying to be mean. This is just how she saw it. Grieving was taking a detour from success.
In contrast what I’ve received from my current coach (a coach who plays at a much higher level) is compassion, gentle encouragement and a lot of support. For him, success is a “whole life” game.
And I have managed to create a whole new level of success in my business during a year that was emotionally tough. Money, impact, and joy have all grown.
I don’t know why this has been such a surprise – this is the approach I take with my own clients when we are working on their growth. And yet knowing it and living it are two very different things.